Merrill Hoge is a tool

5 08 2010

I know you think you’re smooth, but in actuality you look like a douche.

Ok so you’re going outside to shoot a Mike Golic conditioning test for content for NFL live, this is all fine, it’s hot outside so you decide to do it with no sports jacket on, this I get, again fine. Where the problem lies is that your tie is a choad (http://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=choad), its wider than it is long dude, with a sports jacket on it still looks pretty douchey but at least it’s tolerable. Without the jacket on you look mentally challenged.

The decision must be made, no jacket, no choad tie, that simple. Don’t you have some ESPN lackey that is supposed to make sure you don’t look like you do? You’re not Michael Irvin, stop looking like a fool for the sole purpose of looking like a fool. At this point your not even a tool, you’re the whole fucking tool shed. With football season upon we are now unfortunate enough to see your stupid ass on ESPN every night.

I’m not crazy right, when you see Merrill Hoge, do you also think of Flat Top from Dick Tracy?

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