Quarterback Heritage Swap!

27 08 2011

White Michael Vick? Black Tom Brady? Black Peyton Manning? Michael Vick as an Eagle? Finkle is Einhorn? This is the stupdiest shit I’ve ever seen.


Donovan McNabb Just Can’t Help Himself

4 08 2011

The Philadelphia Eagles are Donovan McNabb’s ex girlfriend that he just can’t get over.

Donovan is entering his second season “post breakup”, this time with the Minnesota Vikings. The Eagles have been the news of the NFL this off-season.  Naturally Donovan had to say SOMETHING.  He couldn’t stand there seeing his ex-girlfriend get breast implants, lose 2o pounds and not say something (or get a secret boner). Donovan did just that.

“I was there for 11 years, and the biggest thing we brought in was T.O. [Terrell Owens],” said McNabb. “Now they’re getting the so-called ‘Dream Team.’ It’s amazing, but I look back on my career and what they’re doing now … that’s great; that’s excellent. But you’re seeing another side. You’re seeing Andy (coach Andy Reid) taking that chance. It’s not just taking that chance on one guy. They’re taking a chance on a bunch of guys. And they’re spending money. That’s amazing. Ever since the lockout [ended], teams have to spend money.”

Starts right with the “Dream Team” haymaker, coming out swinging.  He might as well said “THOSE ARE SUPPOSED TO BE MY FAKE TITTY IMPLANTS!” and then gone and cried in the corner of the party. Jealousy just oozing off of every word in that statement. Yes you got Terrell Owens and at the time it should have been enough, I mean you had your chance at a Super Bowl. Let’s face facts, you threw up in the fourth quarter of the biggest game of your career.  Those moves the Eagles made were enough, you weren’t. You had a great defense and a sure as shit good enough offense to beat the Patriots, they were begging you to take that game and you didn’t.  So the organization had nothing to do with YOUR shortcomings, you did, and the sooner you realize this the better off you’ll be.

“That’s great, that’s excellent.” What a snarky ass childish comment. Reminds me of Chris Farley’s role as the bus driver in Billy Madison….”Good, great, grand, wonderful!”  Just a bitter as fuck statement from #5. Move on bro.

“You see them and Andy taking these chances” Umm, how exactly signing the best CB in the league taking a chance? Pretty sure he’s as sure a thing as there is in this league.  Getting D.R.C, a former Pro-Bowl CB who is making a measly 1.1 million this season, how exactly is that taking a chance? Signing an absolute beast in the middle, Cullen Jenkins, who won a Super Bowl last year with the Packers, how exactly is that taking a chance? And no they don’t have to spend money until 2013 under the new CBA, so you’re wrong there as well.

“Now they bring in a Cullen Jenkins, and we all know he’s a dominant force. They bring in a Nnamdi Asomugha. You have Rodgers-Cromartie, who is the one they don’t mention the most because they have Asante Samuel, too. The problem is: What do you do with Asante Samuel?

Hey Donovan, ever hear of having a good problem? Yeah having 3 sick CB’s in a passing oriented league is a good problem to have.

“Then, you’ve got to worry about DeSean (Jackson). When he comes back are you going to give DeSean the ball or throw it to (Jeremy) Maclin? Remember, you have to give LeSean McCoy the ball, too. And then at the end you still have to pay Mike Vick. They have more problems than people are looking at.”

Hey Donnie, nothing has changed on the offensive side of the ball (aside from the O line) since last season when everything went just swimmingly.  Remember that explosive offense last year? What’s gonna change? Nothing.  You still have to get the ball to the same 4 people as last year, the only addition is RB Ronnie Brown, who is a “wildcat’ coaches wet dream, he can run, pass, catch and do it all.  Andy Reid is going to have a blast this year and the offense is explosive enough to spread the love around….without you. Get over it, move on, we all know we have.

Yeah dude, your ex girlfriend got fake titties, lost 20 pounds, shaved all her body hair and got sexy as shit.  Sorry you can’t reap those sexy benefits, but we will.  Move on Donny, she broke up with you.

Is It Weird That Cullen Jenkins Has Me Most Excited?

3 08 2011

Yes, yes it is.  The Eagles have absolutely annihilated this free agency period, that has lasted all of seven days.  Perhaps my favorite move was the front office acknowleding the fact that Broderick Bunkley was an absolute ass puppet waste of a first round pick and signing a beast in the middle in Cullen Jenkins was perhaps their best move.

The dude is a beast, the type of beast the Eagles have needed for several seasons now that 1st round picks Broderick Bunkley and Mike Patterson have under performed. Patterson is decent against the run whereas he has a tough time naturally getting to the QB. Bunkley was a waste of space and money and I for one am glad to see him gone. Bring in a prototypical DT that can blow off peoples blocks and actually force pressure on the QB.  Thank you for coming to town Cullen.

He’s someone, with the addition of Jason Babin and Trent Cole that opposing QB’s are finally going to have to start thinking about.  Last year, you doubled teamed Trent Cole and you pretty much had the Eagles pass rush figured out.  This year there is three legit threats offensive lines have to worry about….and Trent Cole needs to prove he can do it late in the season.

Finally then one of the deepest secondaries in the league now.  Finally the Eagles think they have a pass rush on their hands and with this secondary to back it up? Should be pie. Although Asante appears to be unhappy and the Eagles are fielding offers for the cornerback.  Either way with DRC and Nnamdi they’re still is much better shape than they were last year, a flaw that was exploited constantly.  Defensive tackle was one of the positions that was an absolute necessity; that they filled with the best player on the market. Unless they can trade Samuel for a proven veteran LB don’t expect the Eagles to bring in any other LB’s, the Eagles may feel as though the strength of a pass rush combined with that secondary in a passing league is enough to cover up the LB’ing corps.

Oh yeah, they signed RB Ronnie Brown and OT Ryan Harris today as well. Ho hum, just filling holes everywhere.


2 08 2011


Today Actually Happened

30 07 2011

What happens when professional sports start imitating fantasy sports? You’d be a Philadelphia sports fan. Life imitating art, beautiful.

I always thought Asomugha was black.

Aside from championship days in this town, today was hands down one of the most historic to happen in our sports world.  The Eagles came out of nowhere to sign the hands down best free agent on the market in Nnamdi Asomugha and then to complete the day our other GM assasin Reuben Amaro pulled Hunter Pence out of his ass without giving up either Domonic Brown or Vance Worley.  I had a tough time writing that previous sentence because it doesn’t seem real. You know?

Asomugha not only came here, but came here for what seems to be less money.  Nnamdi will get a 5 year deal worth 60 million with 25 million guaranteed.  That’s only one million more guaranteed than what the Jets signed Santonio Holmes for. “Experts” were predicting that Asomugha would get in the 18 million a year range, but he appears to have taken less to play in Eagles green. Not only that, NY lost out on another prized free agent……that ended up in PHILADELPHIA. Are you kidding me? I don’t think I can ever talk shit on Howie Roseman…EVER (Joe Banner jabs are just fun ya know?) THEN…..

Hunter Pence came to the Phillies from Houston for a package of Jarred Cosart, Johnathan Singleton, Josh Zeid and a player to be named later.  Oh yeah, the Astros are also giving the Phillies 1 million dollars….no seriously. That 1 million will allow the Phillies to stay under the luxury tax. Yes, that just happened. “Big Move” Reub has done it again and did it without giving up any current players.  The best team in baseball just got a lot, lot better. July 29th is just a day when Phillies get shit done, the past three July 29th’s have brought us Cliff Lee, Roy Oswalt and Hunter Pence.  As someone who grew up loving the Phillies in the 90’s, this shit blows my mind.  We already have a historic team and the best record but we weren’t satisfied.  Reuben sees a three-year championship window in front of him and he’s doing whatever is possible to GUARANTEE that we win. I love him.

Today, well today was a great day. That is all, nothing else you’ll read here you won’t elsewhere. 

Eagles “Forgot” To Mention Brandon Graham’s Microfracture Surgery

16 07 2011

Last year, nearing the end of the season on December 12th, Eagles rookie defensive end Brandon Graham tore his ACL in his knee, but was that all that happened?

Yes, that’s Brandon Graham’s surgically repaired knee under there.

I’ve torn my ACL/MCL and torn my meniscus, this is not a fun surgery, but even worse was the rehab, hands down.  It’s a tough surgery to come back from, which physically takes about 8-12 months to fully recover from.  Never mind how long it takes you to get back mentally, which probably take a year and half to get confidence back in the knee.  Even without complications, Graham most likely wouldn’t be ready for the start of this season anyway….then news broke this week.

Graham on top of his ACL surgery is also having the terrifying micro-fracture surgery on the same knee.  Funny, the Eagles never mentioned this until it came to light this past week.  Micro-fracture surgery usually take around the same recovery time as an ACL surgery, but the response the body has to the surgery is far less predictable than that of just ACL surgery.  Essentially holes are drilled into the underlying bone in hopes that the holes will spring new life for cartilage to grow (what happened, I blacked out). Apparently the need for this surgery was discovered when the doctors went in for the ACL surgery and noticed a need for the micro-fracture surgery.  The popularity of the surgery has surged lately as it is a minimally invasive surgery that usually takes anywhere from 30 minutes to 90 minutes to finish and with its success rate is an easier option than knee replacement.

Weird, the Eagles seemed to have “forgotten” to mention this during their December 22nd press conference when they made statements about Graham’s knee….

“Brandon Graham had his knee repaired and that was successful – Anterior Crucial Ligament and Dr. (James) Andrews did that. And they’re both resting well right now, so they’ll get on the rehab as soon as they possibly can.” -Andy Reid (December 22, 2010)

Huh. No mention of micro-fracture surgery from the Coach. It must have been left off his laminated notes sheet for that press conference.  Fairly shady move to not mention it, and I see no reason to cover it up, except for that fact that we probably won’t be seeing Graham until at least half way through this season. At least I suppose the Eagles didn’t give us the typical Flyers injury update of a “lower body injury”.

Keep in mind that this is the same surgery that has kept Victor Abiamiri from returning to action. But as many unsuccessful surgeries come from micro-fracture i.e. Abiamiri and Greg Oden, there are more success stories than not.  Some of those including Amare Stodemire, Hope Solo, Jason Kidd and Kenyon Martin.  Let’s hope Brandon ends up in the success stories rather than the Oden hemisphere.

  Thanks to Crossing Broad for the tip…..http://www.crossingbroad.com/2011/07/brandon-graham-had-microfracture-surgery.html

Plaxico Is A Stage Five Clinger

8 07 2011

Dude is giving straight oral love to the city of Philly.  Wants to be here so bad, as bad as Andy Dufresne wanted to find that tree Red told him about.  Would Plax even be happy at this point if he signed elsewhere? I don’t think so.  He wants to be here in Philly with the street cred team of the Eagles.  He wants to ball out with Vick and Desean so bad it hurts.

Personally I still think the Eagles need to address defense before they bring in big Plax, but for the value and incentive based contract you could get him for, this is a move they should make.

Plaxico recently stated that the reason he wears a Phillies hat so often is that because Jimmy Rollins is his favorite baseball player.  Yeah, sure thing bro.  You want our nuts and we want your bullet wounded leg here.  Let’s make this happen.